Most Valuable Player - Miguel Tejada, Oakland Athletics

Unless we missed the announcement that they changed the name to the "Best Player Award," Tejada beats out A-Rod. Why? Simple: With A-Rod the Ranger finished in last place. How "valuable" could he have been to his team when they couldn’t have done any worse without him? Tejada didn’t have the season A-Rod did–numbers wise. A-Rod didn’t hit a ninth inning come-from-behind three-run homer to win the team’s 18th consecutive game and then have another game-winning hit in the bottom of the ninth the next day. In fact, A-Rod didn’t have a meaningful hit after late April. Tejada was there picking the A’s up all season.

Cy Young - Barry Zito, Oakland Athletics

See notes on Zito and Martinez in the 2002 All Bucketfoot Team.

Rookie of the Year - Eric Hinske, Toronto Blue Jays

The sad part is that Oakland had to trade this guy to fill a hole created by free agency.

NATIONAL LEAGUE

Most Valuable Player - Barry Bonds, San Francisco Giant Chokers

198 walks. 47 home runs. Batting title. Sosa may have actually had a more productive season and was without a doubt a better "team player," but even we can’t deny Bonds this one.

Cy Young - Randy Johnson, Arizona Diamondbacks

Look at the numbers. He has just cemented his place in Cooperstown.

Rookie of the Year - Jason Jennings, Colorado Rockies

Not only did he pitch well enough to win the award REGARDLESS of throwing in Denver, he did it while the team’s overpaid ace, Mike Hampton, complained that you just can’t pitch in Denver.